Sad Banana # 8 "The Fall"

Superman's Weakness: Kyropnite

The Fall

I made it a few steps out the door and then BOOM I hit the floor. I couldn't get up. I couldn't feel my legs. I was numb from the waist down. My legs felt detached from my body. This wasn't the first time this has happened. I tried staying calm but fear overcame my thoughts. This has been happening on a weekly basis. I call it The Curse of the Christopher Reeves Dump. It's where your sitting on the toilet for so long that you feel paralyzed from the waist down. Your blood flow decreases as tingling increases to the point you can't walk. It's a sensation that's unexplainable yet only felt by sitting on the toilet for more than an half and hour (it's the kryponite of sh*tting).

My Weakness: The Toliet

I laid on the floor not more than two steps from the bathroom in awkward pain. I was rolling on floor laughing (rofl) as I tried to gain feeling back in my leg. I laid there for a few minutes thinking... will I ever walk again? I mustered up the courage to get up and stand on my own 2 feet. I felt like Forest Gump when he broke away from his knee brace and learned how to run. It was a miracle! My life was back on track and I could walk.

Prevent future injuries

I'm thinking of having a wheelchair in the bathroom for future incidents. Luckily, I walked away with no major injuries. It could've been worse, I could've broken a leg to pooping. That would've been a horrible way to break a leg. Don't let The Curse of Christopher Reeves attack while your on the porcelain. There are no common similarities in his victims as he is likely to strike anyone who sits on the toilet for an extended period of time. No matter what age, gender, race, or religious beliefs you have. Pray all you want but The Curse of Christopher Reeves can't be undone... (or you just eat a diet rich in fiber and cut the time your on the toilet in half)