Bloggy Smlogyy 15

Intro

I've decided not to talk about poop in this blog. So, if your upset about this read no further but I know your a poop enthusiast like myself. But I've come to realization that poop is easy to talk about and I've already explored the wide world of dumping to every extent. I have no more to say about fecal matter. It's actually been a sad day, when it dawned on me. It's like when Brett Favre retired from football. I'm going to retire from blogging about poop. It's my passion but what more else can I say about diarrhea? Enjoy the first poop free blog. 100% no poop! No Additives! No Trans Fat in this Blog. I'm detoxing this blog. This Blog is Poop Free Straight from Whole Foods.

I love groupons!!

I bought my first groupon. Doesn't a groupon sound like a senior citizen orgy? Groupon, it's like a group getting it on. I wonder if senior citizens still have threesomes or groupons? Do you ever wonder that? No, you probably don't! Your not as twisted and/or sick as I am. Imagine an old people threesome, how slow and laborious that would be? It would take forever for penetration and climax. Someone would die from all the excitement thus making it a twosome. Just think of all there saggy body parts just sagging all over there place. All that loose skin just hanging out. I wonder if they or when they do come, the guy;s penis just coughs up. Anyways, no segway to the next sentence. I bought a groupon to a sushi place called Ginza. I love eating the sush. Raw fish is amazing. Eat the Sush! Go ahead, go down on some Spicy Tuna Rolls. Enjoy your sush, don't let the wasabi burn you though.

Prime

Michael Jordan was in his prime in 90s when he was playing with the Bulls. Tiger Woods was in his prime in early 00s. In every sport there is always an athlete that's in there prime, in where that athlete totally dominates their sport. Prime doesn't have to be something you describe an athlete's greatness or something you do before you start the lawnmower. There is also, someones sex prime, in where he/she is killing the sex game. Just absolutely slanging beavers left and right. I mean your sex prime can come anytime of your age: high school, college, or young adulthood. I mean I know guy's who were destroying nana in there high school years. Yeah, I get it, “in high school you were the man homey”. But now they have nothing to show for it, but “remember back in the day”. Sometimes, your prime won't hit until the 30s, when you scoop all the divorcees with low self esteem who just need a good romping. Or maybe your prime will come when you turn a senior citizen and your just demolishing “oldies but goodies” or should I stay smashing “the oldies and there goodies”. All I'm saying is don't worry if your a born again virgin or if your a virgin because your prime will come. But as I said, your prime might not be until your an old weathered man who is hooked up to oxygen machine.

The New Gunt

If you have a great aunt, she would be your gunt if you combine those words. If you have more than 2 great aunts, you would have two gunts. Obviously, gunt has a whole different meaning on urban dictionary but I guess that's the beauty of calling your great aunt a gunt (it's the symbolism). So, next time you see your great aunt, you'll probably utter these phrases, “I can't wait to see my gunt today! I haven't seen my gunt in years!” “I wonder if my gunt got any bigger since the last time we got together”

Why Do we Do this?

Why is it that when you always see someone naked your eyes are drawn right to there private parts? It seems to never fail. I'm not sure if its human nature or curiosity. It doesn't matter how busted the naked person your looking is, your going to look. You curious to see how long those floppy tits sag, or how low those beef curtains droop, or how gross those old man balls are. Next time you walk by a naked person, you'll catch yourself gazing at there “no no spot”. It's innate behavior that can't be ignored. I guess you want to see how you size up against the average man. Or you want to compare your girlfriend's titties to the next girl. It's not like I see naked people everyday but when you do on TV, porno, or any other visual technological advice that emits photos of naked people, your going to look at there thingies.

Sorry Bob

I felt bad I used a Bob Marley T Shirt as a c rag. For many reasons, he's a dude, a great musician, and he's dead. When I first wrote this sentence, I just put, “I felt bad I used Bob Marley as a c rag” and didn't insert the T Shirt part. The sentence took a whole new meaning. It appeared to the reader that I used Bob Marley as a c rag which would be utterly disgusting and perverted on all new levels. Don't worry Bob. We be jammin!!! I'm chanting down Babylon in the name of I and I, Jah Rastarfari!!!!

My New Life Goal: Theater Head

I've heard of people doing it in the movie theaters, which sounds outrageous. How does one do that and get away with it? Well, I'm not that adventurous but I would like to get theater head. I'm looking for some theater head while watching a lame movie. Just laying out at the Budget Theater getting dome to Eat, Pray, Love. Man that would be heaven and a slice of cherry pie on the side.

DWB

I think all of us have drove a little buzzed up from time to time after a night out of drinking. We probably shouldn't have driven in many cases, but we were too cheap to split a $10 cab ride home. Really $10 bucks? Yet, we were cool with paying $4 a pint of Miller Lite in a half washed glass. Wisconsin is ridden with DUI (Driving Under the Influence) offences. There's too many to count. But there's a more threatening plague out there. There has been a sudden wave of DWB's (Driving With Boner). I'm guilty of this offense which to this date is not illegal, just looked down upon as immoral. I've been getting DWB's since I got my license, luckily I haven't been pulled over. Fight DWB and “change the oil” before you go out. DWB's have been on the rise literally and only you can stop them.

420 Mannnnnnnnn......

man the font was in bold, i took bold font off now its not bold. whoa im high im really high um i smoked weed i smoked k2 umm idoont know go weed day! its 4 20 man. what if it was not four twenty but if was fortytwo zero. get or four hundred and twenty. it wouldnt be 4 20. that is deep stuff i dont think u guys r on my level u guys dont know anything now. im a higher being i feel like he man in master of the universe. he was really strong and he had a big sword that was i like him a lot. i like grilldor to. he made laugh. he was a funny character as well spoiler alert. he man saves the world. and courtney cox parents are still dead. but they died in movie. spoiler alert. grill dor knew the notes to make machine work. that chick hot. the end. go rent masters of univere with he man and courtney cox

420 Mannnnn portion of the blog was written by a stoned man, actual types were written.